No one in this country forgets that Valentine's Day is just around the corner. All of the florists, greeting card, and candy companies are barraging us with their advertising, reminding us that only by buying their products can we prove our love to someone. I began to wonder just how this all came about in the first place. Having been brought up in Catholic schools, I knew, of course, that a St. Valentine was said to have been responsible for this whole outpouring of love, but I didn't remember anything else about him. So I did what any other modern person does - I searched the Internet. 'From your Valentine'It was fascinating to learn that the Catholic Church lists three different St. Valentines. The one associated with love matching seems to be the priest who served during the third century in Rome. When Emperor Claudius II decided that single men made better soldiers, he outlawed marriages for young men, his crop of potential soldiers. Valentine, realizing the injustice of the decree, defied Claudius and continued to perform marriages for young lovers in secret. Of course, he was discovered and Claudius had him put to death. While in prison, however, he fell in love with the jailer's daughter, a blind girl who visited him during his confinement. Through his strong faith he was able to restore her sight, and before dying sent her a love letter, signing it "From your Valentine," an expression that is still used today. We can't know how much of these legends are true, of course, but the facts are not important. It is enough to know that there is truth in the essence. The church approves of love and marriage, elevating marriage to a sacrament, and then there's the fact that Christ performed his first public miracle at the marriage feast in Cana. But something more occurred to me recently: St. Valentine is still at work in the church! And he's working on senior citizens! Finding loveThis Christmas I heard from two friends who last year were widowed and grieving, but this year have celebrated the sacrament of marriage and now have a new lease on life. Our friend, Jim, a retired Chicago school principal, sent us the program from his wife's funeral last year. We immediately wrote to him expressing our sympathy, and a short time later he showed up on our doorstep for a visit. It was a painful two hours we spent with him as he recalled in detail his wife's prolonged illness and death. His grief was palpable and deep. He talked about the possibility of joining a monastery, which didn't surprise us, since he has always been a devout Catholic and a Daily Masser. When we received a Christmas card from him this year, out fell his wedding picture. He married someone from church, of course. I also heard from my friend Anne in Milwaukee, who has remarried. She participated in a special church function for single Catholics after the death of her Chuck. There she noticed Tony, a recent widower sitting off by himself, so she went over and introduced herself and urged him to join the festivities. That was two years ago. They were married last spring. True loveLast week's news tops everything. Our friend, John, who was widowed in June, is planning to remarry on Valentine's Day this year. John is a faithful Daily Masser, who met his fiancée at (where else?) daily Mass. Faustine was a long-time acquaintance and friend of his wife, who when she knew she was dying asked John if he would remarry after her death. He didn't think so, but she told him she thought it was the best thing for him and even suggested he consider Faustine. Amazing? Yet, when you consider how loving someone means wishing for his happiness, it is not such a strange request. Sacred missionI suppose one could argue that finding a spouse in church is not surprising if that's where you hang out every day. If these guys hung out in bars, they might have found themselves matched up with someone quite different. I, however, firmly believe it's more than that. I believe that those who turn to God for solace in their grief will get direct results, if not another loving spouse, at least the warmth and comfort of a loving community. And now that I know more about St. Valentine, I like to believe that he is working overtime in the church even today. Isn't it good to know that when life deals us the worst blow, the loss of a spouse, St. Valentine is there in church still going about with his sacred mission of matchmaking. "Grandmom" likes hearing from other senior citizens who enjoy aging at P.O. Box 216, Fort Atkinson, WI 53538.
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