To heal a broken heart: Rest in Christ

		Notes from the  Vicar General  Msgr. Paul J. Swain

Have you ever had a broken heart?

All the songs written about it suggest a painful experience. "How do you mend a broken heart? How do you stop the tears from falling down?" one laments. Hearts are broken when someone disappoints us, turns against us, or turns away.

Our hopes and expectations are dashed; tears of regret and loss come falling down. Sometimes in our human weakness we can break our own hearts.

Someone suggested that sin is not so much breaking God's law, as breaking God's heart. It is a penetrating image to behold, recalling Jesus weeping over Jerusalem. We disappoint, turn against, or turn away from our God who loves us so much. For most of us, most of the time, we know when we have made bad choices, put ourselves ahead of God.

Forgive and move beyond

Once we sin in that way, we are never quite the same again. Jesus taught us to forgive as he has forgiven us, which is as often as necessary, but never easy. Even when we forgive others or have been forgiven, we have a hard time forgetting. Such memories can be a weight that wears us down, or an opportunity to learn and move beyond.

Some years ago, I was driving from Sun Prairie to the hospitals on a beautiful summer day. I decided to take the scenic route and turned from my normal path to drive by the lake.

My car was hit broadside. I do not think I was at fault, but my car was in for repairs for several weeks and my leg ached for many more. To this day, whenever I drive by that spot, I remember the accident, slow down and look around.

Remembering our past sins and errors, we can learn to slow down when confronting the issues of the present, and not make the same mistakes.

Often we rationalize ourselves into unhealthy behavior. This is especially so when our culture sends the message that anything goes. For most of us there are areas we better not open up because they lead us down a path where we lose control. That is why regular examination of conscience and use of the sacrament of reconciliation is important. They help us to be alert to those areas.

Come, I will give you rest

Jesus died on the cross, in part, that we might be healed and begin anew. How soothing his invitation: come to me all who are weary and find life burdensome, and I will give you rest. That rest comes when we in faith own up and seek forgiveness, and commit ourselves to follow him with grateful and restored hearts.

There are many ways in which hearts can be broken in this day of terror, scandal, and secularism. Jesus asks us to take his yoke upon us, to allow him to guide us, and to learn from him. It is an invitation we must accept each day, if we are not to break, not only God's laws, but God's heart.

Ripples, but no tidal wave:
In court remap of state Legislature

		Eye on the  Capitol  John Huebscher

The long awaited decision and order from federal district court in Milwaukee redrawing Wisconsin's legislative districts produces several ripples in the legislative pond but no tidal wave displacing large numbers of Wisconsin's 33 State Senators and 99 Assembly Representatives.

Unless altered by a legislature sometime in the next decade, the map drawn by the court will govern legislative elections from 2002 through 2010. Following are one person's observations on their handiwork.

Reflecting changes

Because reapportionment reflects changes in population, shifts in district boundaries mirror the trends in population movement around Wisconsin. The court's map is similar to others in the last 30 years and accounts for the "out-migration" of population from Milwaukee to suburbs and the "collar counties" around Milwaukee.

The result is that the city of Milwaukee is losing one Assembly District to neighboring Waukesha and other districts in the city shift outward to incorporate more territory from the suburbs.

The thing legislators fear most from reapportionment is being paired with another incumbent and being forced to run for reelection in a district in which they are less well known. The new map produced some "paring" in the Assembly but in a way that should wreak relatively little havoc with legislative careers.

A number of Assembly representatives are "paired" with a colleague in the same district but in most cases, one of the two can easily move a short distance in to a neighboring district that has no incumbent and which includes a significant portion of their "old" district.

One exception will be in the 84th Assembly District in eastern Waukesha County where two Republican incumbents, Mark Gundrum and Marc Duff, have indicated they will engage in a friendly competition for the seat. Some Milwaukee Democrats may face similar choices. However, legislators have until mid-July when nomination papers must be filed to make up their minds so some plans may yet change.

The map of Wisconsin's 33 State Senate districts produced one pair. The "new" 33rd Senate district pairs 11th District Senator Joanne Hueslman in the same district as newly elected Ted Kanavas, who was elected last year in the 33rd District to succeed Lt. Gov. Margaret Farrow. Senator Huelsman, who has served in the legislature for 20 years, has announced that she will retire.

The map includes two Senate districts, the 11th in Jefferson, Walworth, and Waukesha counties, and the third in Milwaukee County with no incumbent. The 11th is likely to stay Republican, the third should remain Democratic.

Results of new map

The strategists for both parties are prone to say that the new map is good for them and will make it easier for their respective teams to win a majority of the seats come November. However, most independent observers are of the opinion that by itself, the reapportioned districts will not do much to overturn the Democratic edge in the Senate and the Republican control of the Assembly.

No doubt many partisans had hoped that the courts would give them a map that helped their side and forced their opponents into retirement. It seems instead that the judges kept changes to a minimum and determined that voters, not the courts should decide whether incumbent legislators should be forced into retirement.

And that was the right decision.

John Huebscher is executive director of the Wisconsin Catholic Conference.

Father's Day: Take some time to appreciate men in your life

		Common-day  Spirituality  Mary Rose  Remington

Male bashing has become a national sport.

For those unfamiliar with the term, it's when we women gather to complain about every negative thing our spouse/dad/boyfriend/boss has done over the past year. As with any sport, things get fairly competitive with lines like this one bantered back and forth across coffee cups, "If you think that's bad, listen to what my husband did!"

A friend once paid me an odd compliment. "I really enjoy getting together. You don't rip on your husband like so many of my friends do." Let me attempt to crawl down off this tipsy pedestal without getting hurt.

Truthfully, I have uttered an occasional bad word about my husband over the past 20 years, but most days I do appreciate him: my life mate, lover, friend, and father of my children. This may sound boastful, but he's an even better man because of my love, support, guidance, and moderating influence. As my teenage daughter says, "You've trained him well, Mom."

Today I see men undergoing a transformation - for the better. They're rising to the challenge of parenting in ways their fathers never did, striving for work/life balance and connecting with people on deeper levels. Heck, some men even discuss their feelings!

Are there things men can improve upon? Definitely. But from where I sit, men appear headed in the right direction. Here are the trends I've noticed:

• More dads are volunteering in school classrooms, chaperoning field trips, and joining PTA.

• Some new fathers are taking paternity leave to care for and bond with their newborns.

• Adult sons taking family medical leave to care for dying family members.

• Multiple men's groups forming at churches and community centers.

• Men finally entering therapy to "work on their stuff."

• Men shedding sacred tears in church healing ceremonies.

• Divorced dads staying involved in their child's life, instead of "checking out."

My belief is that men and women are created with both feminine and masculine traits. We are healthiest, whole, and most effective when we accept, integrate, and use both. There are times when we should be aggressive, yet some circumstances may require a passive, contemplative approach. There is room in this world for logic, but at other times intuition works best. Pray for the discernment in your daily struggles to know which approach to use - masculine or feminine.

Men, feel free to tap your feminine side. Use your intuition. Split the housework and cooking. Participate wholeheartedly in parenting. Meet a friend for lunch this week, eat quiche, and split a dessert (real men do).

May God bless all you teachers, coaches, foster dads, uncles, and clergy who serve as father figures. Happy Father's Day!

Mary Rose Remington, a member of St. Thomas Becket Parish in Eagan, Minn., is a writer, career coach, and speaker.